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Welcome to my utmost random thoughts on random shit that really doesn't matter much.
This is where my mind takes a dump.
~ Sticks, Stones and Funnybones ~
Part 14 - The New Order
The New Order
Today, newly instated Interim Israeli Prime Minister Ehud Olmert declared:
"In the next few years, we will change Israel's character to ensure it will be a state with a solid Jewish majority living in defensible borders that can provide security to the residents of Israel and separate us from those who must live alongside us and not among us."
Sounds like a recipe for a reversed holocaust, if you ask me. The above statement is Political for:
“In the next few years, we are going to methodically cleanse Israel from the Palestine vermin that has infested our rightfully claimed lands – whatever it takes. We regret that we will have to pretend to act benevolently to these non-Jewish fuckheads in the meantime.”
Sounds like the opposite of Hitler’s agenda to me, but just as bad. These people, if any, should have learned that dire lesson from history. The difference between ethnical cleansing and genocide is smaller than you could imagine, but I guess since Israel performs it in baby steps the world will never notice. Why is it that we give Israel free reign to carry out whatever fuckuppedness they see fit to do, to separate themselves from the realities of the world? How much longer are we all going to play the pity violin for them, and not see what the hell is really going on? They’re just as bad, if not worse, as everybody else over there.
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The Saint
As soon as a Kennedy is in trouble we talk about the “Kennedy Curse”. I call bullshit. These people use any excuse to explain why their spoiled rotten lives go to hell in the whirlwind of corrupt politics, drugs and irresponsibility. Just because they had ole’ St. JFK they feel they have a license to fuck themselves and everybody else over and still be smiled gently upon, as if they cannot help it. Poor cursed Kennedies, right? We impeached Clinton for a harmless blowjob, but happily turn a blind side to Catholic Golden Boy and Party Animal John F. Kennedy committing bona fide adultery by fucking the brains out of Marilyn Monroe and also pretending he didn’t have heavy ties to the Mafia (there is no such thing as the Mafia, BTW). He couldn’t do anything wrong, that St. JFK, and got credited for a lot of shit he didn’t do. It was his brother who wrote the Civil Rights Act, and it was Lyndon B. Johnson who signed it – JFK was busy drinking Champagne out of hooker shoes.
Now, latest, it was US Rep. Robert Kennedy who had a fender bender after zonking out on drugs and booze. He immediately issued a statement that he is seeking treatment for his “illness” and his father, Senator Sean Kennedy, issued another statement saying how proud he was of his son for taking responsibility for his shortcomings.
The cops who arrived at the scene were instructed by their superior to give Kennedy a ride home, without giving him a sobriety test, and the rest were ordered to return to duty, without filing any reports. Does that shit ever happen to you?
Fuck these people. Never mind Alcoholics Anonymous, enroll the whole bunch in Attentionwhores Anonymous and then forget all about them. The glory of St. JFK’s legacy only reaches so far, people – blood relations, or not.
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The Rag
Rolling Stone Magazine turned 1000 issues this week. To commemorate the event the cover features pretty much everybody and their mothers. Mostly old farts, of course. Remember when Rolling Stone Magazine was cool? Chances are you don’t, since you’re not that fucking old, are you? Anyway… Time has overtaken the old rag and they have totally lost their edge. Instead of breaking new ground and shining the spotlight on trends they help create, they are just reporting the same shit everybody else is. Risk-taking is for the young and bold, not for the jaded and old.
Wanna check out a truly great magazine? Buy the British rag Mojo at your local Barnes and Noble. They still treat the world of music with a sense of awe, love, excitement and respect – past, contemporary or future artists alike.
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The Rock
A huge slab of rock continues to grow to the skies out of Mount St. Helens’ crater in the state of Washington. It has now reached a majestic height of 300 ft and grows at a steady pace of 4 ft per day. It is smooth and fin shaped, looking like it’s going places.
All it needs now is a really cool soundtrack and a couple of monkeys.
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The Fizz
The nation's largest beverage distributors agreed to stop delivering non-diet sodas to the beverage machines in most public schools, in a combined effort to help fight child obesity. Never mind that the soda machines are right next to the snack machines and right outside the cafeteria where they serve cheese burgers with Mac & Cheese. What the hell does it matter what these fat fucking kids use to wash down the calories with? Diet soda, or not – it doesn’t matter. The bubbles in either only serve to speed up the rate at which calories, carbohydrates and fat are absorbed into the blood stream and distributed to fill fat pockets and clog arteries. Wanna make a difference? Stop eating so fucking much, kids. Drink more water. Run more, play less videogames. There. I solved it for you.
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The Videostar
I have to say, I am actually surprised about how the quality of some music videos have picked up lately. Nickelback’s “Savin’ Me” is like a quality episode out of The Twilight Zone and Red Hot Chilipepper’s “Dani California” tribute to the history of music, in all its ugly shapes, is pure visual genius. If only the rap genre could think up something else than bitches, guns and bling-bling, and the lone-guy-with-a-piano genre could think up something less whiney, we could actually start moving forward into the next generation of music videos.
Not that I would be caught dead watching MTV, but still…
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