The Truth Hurts Like A Motherfucker

The Truth Hurts Like A Motherfucker. Isn’t that what we are about? DRS, I mean… Controversial topics… Isn’t that what you love to debate with your more intelligent friends and family members?

In this day and age what is controversial anyway? So, as I sit here on a Wednesday morning looking for controversy, I find nothing. But at this stage of the game what would I find controversial enough to make me put my coffee down?

Is there anything out there so outrageous, or incredibly off the wall wacky, that makes us all blush as one? Is there anything these days worth getting all bent over? Maybe I’m just jaded, but I sure as hell can’t be bothered. People are so hypocritical anyway. They discuss anything but the things that really matter. Weather? Sure. The Yankees? Sure. Your mother’s friggin' ailments? Sure. But mention religion, sexual preferences, or politics and most people clam up like nuns at a sailor convention. Oh please. Get over yourselves.

So I did a little Googling, searched for “most controversial topics”, and the things below are what I came up with. I will answer them all for you right now. This way you get all the controversy in your life out of your system and can have a pleasant week, free from worries.

This is the California State University at Long Beach’s list of controversial topics, with my answers attached:

1. Should same sex marriage be legal?

Answer: Hell yes. What do you care? If two people are in a committed relationship, what skin is it off your nose if they receive the same rights as heterosexual couples get? Give me a break.

2. Are Botox injections really needed?

Answer: Are they kidding me? They (CSU – Long Beach) are asking this of kids who have everything in place. They (the kids) don’t realize now the damage that age and children will do to them in another 15 years. So, yes.  Botox injections really are needed. By those of us with too much money and too little self-esteem to handle growing older gracefully.

3. Is stem cell research ethical?

Answer: Yes.

4. Did the Holocaust really happen?

Answer: Umm, yes. I never got the whole “It never happened” thing. If that’s what you believe, the chances are high that you’re sucking on a blade of grass somewhere pondering the benefits of a good spray.

5. Should religion be in the public schools?

Answer: This is a funny one. No. But where do you draw the line? Do you let them have “winter festivals” and totally ignore the fact that they are celebrating Christmas, but then turn around and give them two weeks off for that one holiday? Hmmm?

6. What are sexual controversies?

Answer: Then they break it down -

•Abortion… All for it.

•Date Rape… Against it.

•Gays and Lesbians in the Military… As long as you don’t let the nasty Swiss invade my shores because you are busy blowing some guy, I’m cool with it.

•Hate Crimes… Why is this controversial? If you beat someone ‘cause they are whatever then you should be prosecuted.

•Pornography… Yeah, ok. Let’s try to get rid of porn. Good luck with that. I’m all for it anyway. Porn that is. Love it.

•Prostitution … Legalize it. Get them off the fucking streets.

7. “Under God”? The Constitutionality of the Pledge of Allegiance.

Answer: Who does this hurt? How do you know what God you are pledging to anyway? It doesn’t say, “One Nation under a Christian, Pagan or Jewish God”. It’s just God. Either you believe or you don’t. And if you don’t then what do you care? Just don’t pledge.

8. Should there be a separate criminal offense for date rape?

Answer: No. Rape is rape.

9. Do advertisements affect women's fashion image?

Answer: This is the worst one. Maybe they are asking if ads affect women’s self-image. “Like, OMG, that girl only weighs 72 pounds, I should diet.” Of course they affect the image women have of themselves, but here’s a big old newsflash for you.  Advertisements do NOT affect girls/women as much as their moms do. If you, as a mother, don’t beat it into that little snot’s head that she is who she is and she had better love it, then YOU suck.

10. Should we have the Death Penalty?

Answer: Yes.

11. Should guns be banned in the workplace?

Answer: Yes, and not only in the workplace either. All hand guns should be banned.

All those are still not very controversial to me. Kinda boring even. So here’s a couple more topics for you to chew on. These are just some personal favorites…

* I think it’s ok to give your kid a good smack when he or she needs it. This whole crap with putting kids on a pedestal and not setting them straight will screw them over later in life. There is nothing I hate more than seeing parents let their kids run roughshot over them. You’re in charge, not they, and if it takes a light smack to make them see that when they’re out of line, so be it. I got doofed all the time as a kid and I turned out all right.

* If you hit a guy for whatever reason and he smacks you right back… I have no problem with that. At the same time, I don’t know any guy that would be stupid enough to smack me back. Some chicks seem to think they have a license to do anything just because they are fragile little flowers. Then they get all bent when a guy smacks them back. There are much better ways for women to get back at men other than smacking them anyway. Maybe I should write an article on that? Hmmmm?

* Racial Slurs: See, I don’t get this. If I can call a stupid person an idiot, or a nasty woman a ho, why can’t I call a black person who pisses me off a nigger? Hey nothing personal, but black people that piss me off are fucking niggers.

* Sexual Promiscuity… The whole age old double standard adage. For men it’s experience, but God forbid you, as a woman, have had 40 to 50 lovers by the time you hit your thirties. You’re labeled a slut. I don’t think so. Here’s a newsflash for you: Most women I know have a higher sex drive then most men I know. It only seems that most men have a higher sex drive because it’s cool and “expected”. It's not the sex so much to them as it is the conquest. The hunt. The victory over the gentler sex. That’s why they don’t like women stepping into their territory. It’s their hunting grounds and all that. To them it’s a male power trip, but to us it’s just sex. Enjoy it or pursue it? Who’s the smarter one?

Now… for the benefit of a good discussion, to talk about something other than sports and the weather… each week from now on we will have on our message board a new topic to debate. This week it will be:

Legalize drugs. All of them, some of them or none of them?

Join in.

TTR

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