“The Divine Secrets of the Yeah–Yeah Sisterhood”
I was watching some lovey dovey movie about women friends and how that friendship endures and how they are always there for each other. Fortunately I am off the rag and could see it for the pure unadulterated horseshit it was... Women aren’t friends and misogyny isn’t limited to the male species... Women hate other women.
Maybe it is cultural conditioning. Girl children are brought up to compete with other women for men. From a young age we are poked, prodded and preened. We sacrifice ourselves at the altar of Cosmopolitan, all in the hopes of catching a man, even better if the man we catch is desired by another female. We compare ourselves to other women and make comments about the run down heels on their shoes, their unflattering attire and the bad dye job... If a woman has a good job we like to attribute it to her skills in the blow job area as opposed to her skills in the boardroom. No matter what she has, other women will do their level best to find faults and pick at perceived flaws. Men are actually kinder to women than other women are to one another... For most men a tit in the hand is worth four in a magazine. They aren’t nearly as picky as they like to make themselves out to be. A lot of women subscribe to the idea that it is men that have objectified women to the point that we are caricatures of ourselves. I think we did it to ourselves and each other. We have inflated our breasts into shapes that are almost unrecognizable, painted our faces, curled and dyed our hair, shaved our pubic hair, dieted ourselves into wraiths and then we talk shit about other women that have done the same thing.
Pretty women are generally doomed... Especially pretty women who get along better with men than they do with other women. We expect pretty women to be self-deprecating and if they aren’t then they are stuck up bitches who would fuck your daddy and take your last tampon for spite... God help you if you are a reasonably attractive woman with half a brain and don’t weigh more than your average NFL linebacker.
Does this mean women can never be friends with other women???? Maybe past menopause and in movies, but in real life... or online?? I am just not sure... I can count on one hand the women that are true friends to me... Regardless of the man thing, the hair thing, the boob thing, the job thing... While I would love to have my own Yeah–Yeah Sisterhood, until women stop seeing one another as competition and start blaming those homosexual rat bastards that are really stealing all the good men, that isn’t going to happen I am afraid…
In Absinthe Veritas,
Tallulah Crankhead
