by
Mitzi Dupree
To submit any sort of writing of your own, send your stuff to:

drs@deadrebelsociety.com

Please send in doc- or rtf-formats only.

What is this, 1967?
A Nice Day For a White-ish Wedding
Part 4 - "The Perfect Place"










Dear Mitzi,

I am sorry to inform you that all of our gymnasiums will be occupied on Saturday, August 26.  That weekend is the championships for our Statewide Summer Basketball Program.

If you cannot find a facility for your event and are free on that weekend, we can always use more volunteer referees.  BYOW!  (Bring Your Own Whistle - just a little joke around here).



Belinda Yates
Colorado YMCA Events Coordinator


Riverside Bed & Breakfast
478 Chestnut Street
Louisville, CO 80027






Dear Ms. Dupree,

We are in receipt of your recent e-mail requesting information on reserving our facilities for a wedding on August. 26.

You DID mean 2007? 

Please advise.

Regards,

Mr. Winston Whipple, Proprietor


















“We’ve  Got  the  Corner  on  Quaint”
Riverside Bed & Breakfast
478 Chestnut Street
Louisville, CO 80027




Dear Ms. Dupree,

I’m sorry to inform you that our facilities are booked for August 26, 2006.

They are also booked for August 12, August 19, September 2, September 9, September 16 and September 23. 

The first Saturday we have available is February 3, 2007.  I wouldn’t recommend an outdoor wedding on that date in Colorado, but I will be happy to reserve it for you if you’re not averse to bundling up.

Sincerely,

Winston Whipple, Proprietor








“We’ve  Got  the  Corner  on  Quaint”

Mrs. Hubbard’s Bed & Breakfast
8923 Victoria St.
Denver, CO 80011

"Do It In The Shoe”"




Dear Mitzi,


I’m sorry, dearie, but the “Big Shoe” is already booked for every Friday and Saturday night through the Holiday season.  It’s bad news for you, but frankly, I’m tickled pink.  Who thought a Nursery Rhyme theme could be so popular?




Mother Hubbard



The Hilton Hotel Corporation






Dear Ms. Dupree,


Please be advised that we will not be able to accommodate your request for a ballroom, conference room or “any old empty corner,” as you put it, on Saturday, August 26.

For your reference, the National Shriners’ Convention is being held in Denver that weekend, and you’ll be hard-pressed to find a room anywhere.

Congratulations on your impending nuptials, and good luck with finding that empty corner.

Sincerely,

Marjorie Dawson
Banquet Manager


___________________________________

1124 16th Street, Denver, Colorado 80405


Duffy’s Tavern
23 Main Street
Legacy, Colorado


Mitsi you know you cant have youre party here and I wish youd quit youre dam whining.  You used to be such a cheerful drunken lil lass but lately youve been downright nasty.  Augest 26 is Wilfs 70th berthday and the hole bar has been looking forward to that shindig for 6 monts. 

Yes I know I git half youre paycheck evry weekend but Wilfs been giving me ALL of his paycheck for the past 20 years.  Wilf wins.

You also know dam well I cant get the sticky stuff off the floor.

Duff

Riverside Bed & Breakfast
478 Chestnut Street
Louisville, CO 80027










Dear Ms. Dupree,

No, the party holding their nuptials here on August 26th has not gotten cold feet. 

And offering to “slip me a Benny” will not entice me to cancel their date.

Please rest assured that if the facility should become available on that date, I’ll notify you immediately.




Mr. Winston Whipple, Proprietor









“We’ve  Got  the  Corner  on  Quaint”

Riverside Bed & Breakfast
478 Chestnut Street
Louisville, CO 80027







Ms. Dupree,

Please stop attempting to bribe my staff to give you the name of the couple getting married here on August 26.  I shudder to think of the consequences.

I’m also aware that it’s you leaving those messages on our answering machine.  You think you’re hilarious, but trust me, it’s not the first time someone’s told me where to “stick the Charmin.”

If you do not stop this disturbing behavior, I’ll be forced to notify the authorities.  Perhaps you could have a nice reception in the pokey.





Winston Whipple, Proprietor








“We’ve  Got  the  Corner  on  Quaint”

This is Part 4 to Mitzi's Wedding Series.

Intro

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

Part 5